How to deal with Elementary School (Bullshit) Situations in a Professional “Adult” Setting

1. Ignore it.

2. When ignoring doesn’t work, try to think about why said situation is happening. What are the triggers? What are the feelings associated with the triggers? 

3. If there was a specific trigger, especially in a negative work situation, how would you propose amending the situation, if such a power was in your hands? Usually a direct approach is best.

However, in a lot of cases, there is no specific trigger or event, just a general feeling of dislike or malaise. So how does one deal with the situation in a manner that is not detrimental to one’s own mental health and well-being or to the other in the situation?

4. Try not to place blame. This usually is an ineffective strategy, especially if you feel you are definitely not to blame. But then perhaps, looking at situations empathetically, the other party may feel they are not blame. The blame game seems to be more of a downer and a rite to a feeling of indignation and entitlement, which are perfectly normal and human emotional states, but aren’t very conducive to functional solutions. They serve more as a dwelling place of self-pity.

5. Combat the feelings of isolation and depression. How to go about doing this? Find out what your center is, what motivates you into life. Is it the sun? Is it music? A certain talent? A certain person? One important point of note is that these things are external, therefore cannot be depended upon, because anything and everything external is transient and temporary.

6. Combat the feelings of isolation and depression with a CENTRAL source. As Khalil Gibran said, “Out of suffering have emerged the strongest souls; the most massive characters are seared with scars.” It is in these moments, as small they seem, that we find out who we truly are. Our measure is not only in great periods of suffering, but how we suffer through the woes that grate on us constantly. Find out who you are, truly, and you will see that you are more than this.

7. I am going to expand on the point above, but thought I should start a new number. So many of us define ourselves externally – marks, money, number of friends, hotness, guys/girls dated, sexual appeal, number of books read, papers published. Again, these things are all external, and sooner or later, they’re not going to go the way you want to them to. 

8. What then? It is IMPERATIVE to realize that our self-worth is INHERENT. We are born worthy. So center yourself. Heal yourself. Be kind to yourself. When people get you down, look in the mirror and own who you are, perfections and imperfections in hand. Walk around with your shoulders back, head held high, appearing 6’5” instead of 5’7”. Make the world look at you when you walk. Turn heads by sheer resilience and confidence. Get up with a smile every time someone knocks you down.

9. Have faith. You are exactly where you need to be, even if where you are is a mistake. Nothing is waste, because that means we are dwelling on the past. Live in the present, but be full of hope for the future. There is an entire universe out there, full of promise and possibility. You are an entire universe full of promise and possibility. 

10. When faced with a crossroads between despair and disappointment, always choose disappointment, for a life without hope is no life but a death sentence.

11. Smile. You’ll never know when it’ll be your last time to be able to. More than that, you’ll never know how much another person may have been needing to see that.

12. Surprise your friends and your family. Write notes. Letters. Send songs. “I was just thinking of you.” “I remember you.” Whatever it is. When people around you make you miserable, combat that with sheer force of will. Every frown on your face, fight that with a smile on somebody else’s face. 

13. Be kind to yourself. Be strong. Resilient. Through sheer force you will emerge victorious, just have to keep trudging through.

Cheers!

ps. Couldn't embed the original. Here's the link if you want to hear some beautiful music: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YaVE4WVlsDQ9