I think so often we forget that the whole point of the "boom boom pow" is to have a baby. In society, sex is so detached from the actual POINT of sexual reproduction (i.e. reproduction) that we've forgotten its underlying basis. Therefore, it's absolutely ridiculous to us that not only do people have babies, they WANT to have babies. Ridiculous to me as well, you know, because as much as I'd like to be this independent little amoeba floating through existence, I'm not.
After spending numerous hours in the ultrasound room (not nearly enough, really), it's so fascinating to observe people trying so hard to get pregnant. The anticipation, the repeated "is that normal" question, the joy when you see a little black spot on the screen in the uterus, the anxiety to do everything in your power to protect that little 0.3 cm long thing with all the energy present in your body, mind, and soul.
Do I understand it? Even at this age, I think I can somewhat relate to that joy. It's not an isolated incident by any means. It's the fruition of months of hard work and timing and luck and positive thinking and just being resilient. You don't think so? I do. Never underestimate both the power and the toll of emotional investment.
Sometimes, after a long day, getting a strong powerful heartbeat on a little thing kicking around in a sac of fluid is strangely calming and joyful. For all my aversion to commitment and responsibility, sometimes it seems to be a worthy endeavour. For other people.
I think it's time that some of us celebrated life in all it's fullness, in birth and in death. Maybe they're the same thing. At any rate, it may not be much but it's all we have.
That being said, imma keep my uterus uninhabited for a long long time.
Cheers!
