The "What I am Not" Rant Cliche

I shouldn't browse facebook in a sleep-deprived state. All I see are people who piss me off, who used to call me friends but really don't give two shits about me, who talk about all the good things of this world, and I'm glad that the world for them is sunshine and lollipops, I really really am.

My world isn't like that.

I have money, comfort, family, and for that I am grateful.

I have food, I have friends, I have entertainment.

I have books, cars, comics, jackets.

For these I am grateful.

I have God. I never doubt that. But sometimes I doubt our relationship, not on His end, on my end.

I am selfish and needy, sleep-deprived and angry.

I am horny and hormonal and lonely.

I am full of hurt, things that you don't know about, and sure, go ahead and judge me. I know we're all hurt, I know that. There are a lot of things that have seared my heart. And it makes me full of rage.

I cannot call everything beautiful even though everything is beautiful. There is beauty in symmetry but I see in fragments.

All you who speak about modesty in clothing, what do you know about modesty? You Catholic hypocrites. You pray and pray and I know you WILL go to heaven, you are wonderful people. But, please, I beg you, open your eyes to the words you use. Words like modesty and humility, words like gratefulness and beauty, what do you know? What is modest about insensitivity? What is modest about refusing to acknowledge the basest of human natures and drives? You are sheltered in a cocoon of ignorance and bliss, you are loved and protected by so many, and maybe that is your call in life but I live in the real world, where there is bitterness and gnashing of teeth.

You hypocrites. When you mutter all that is female is supposed to be tiny and feminine and delicate and boys are the men of this world, and at the end all we become is cliche. Maybe at the end, that is the right way, I do not know. Maybe I will be that cliche, maybe I am that cliche. But not now. So enough! Pray for your eyes to be opened. Put an end to your syrupy hypocrisy.

In a world where you're supposed to be "ALL THAT YOU CAN BE", we're awfully miserable. Individualism has blinded us to the true nature of compassion and of selflessness. Not just you, me.

And I swear that I don't have a gun.

Cheers.